kid update

I need to have another blog where I be Sarah and not just 'mommy'. I might just set one up. Maybe later. Maybe.

Well - We're having a little girl in October. At the rate I blog my next post just might be pictures of her! I lent my girl clothes out but I get them back in August and I am so excited to go through them again. I love doing that. Carson is moved in to Athena's room and he still takes his naps no problem. They goof off before falling asleep each night. Athena is so kind to him and they play well together. I love that they have each other.

We call my growing belly "Baby Annie" but we are not sure what we'll name her yet. We do have a list going. Carson is allergic to dairy, eggs, and peanuts still. I think he may becoming more tolerant of dairy though! Which is exciting because that will open a whole new world of foods to him.

Kid moments that made me smile: (I jot them down to write here later)
I was explaining to Athena what it will be like at Conrad's company BBQ - so she knows what's going on.
me: "You'll be one of the smaller kids there."
Athena: "But I'm a little bit of a big kid."

She calls root beer 'Root Bear'
"I need a root bear," she says
I get it for her.
"I need a scoop of ice cream in it."
wish granted.
"and a straw."
I give her a look, but I get the straw.
"And a spoon"
"Are you done?" I ask her
"I need a little umbrella in it!" she replies.
I laugh, "no umbrella honey."


During lunch:
Carson is playing with a hat in his high chair. He's got a plate of watermelon in front of him. He puts his hat in his watermelon.
Athena: "uh- don't put that in your food; that is gonna be gross." - she sounds so mature when she says it.
He puts his hat in his watermelon.
Through clenched teeth- "that is de-sgusting!" - I smile from the other room. I like hearing her have an opinion. And I love that she is having a mature conversation with her little brother.

Sometime during the day: She approaches Carson with a bossy tone: "What did I said?!"

And this one surprised me:
"Ahh, I'm enjoying a cigarette. It's good for your body." She whispers it so quietly.
"Where did you hear that?" I ask quietly.
"From myself," she says.
"We don't say that. Cigarettes are not good for your body," I say.
"but I just pretend to eat one," she says.
"I don't want you to pretend to eat one either," I say decidedly.
"okay," she says sheepishly.
(We checked out a book at the library that discusses smoking. We also have neighbors who smoke. I told her, "When people smoke we still be their friend, but we don't smoke. It hurts your body.")

She's very interested in the difference between the look of a smoker's lung and a healthy lung. She's also interested in the development of a fetus. She loves the pop-up book that shows developmental pictures of a baby in utero. We skip the page with a giant pop-up penis. It's one of those see through views where you can see the tissue and organs and urethra and all that. I don't think she would understand what it was, but I'm not taking any chances. Maybe when she's older. Much... older.

I guess I'll update

I am learning to relinquish a little control and say "no" less often. I need to let Athena have her way more and give her more wiggle room. She's getting older, and more independent; and lately she doesn't comply with a lot of my requests. Many of you recognize this behavior as childhood!, Or human nature. So I'll relax and let her 'fart around' as I call it.

I'm also taking this approach to scouts. I teach the bear cub scouts and there's a side to my temperament that allows me to be quick-witted with them and take them off guard with my surprising humor. It ropes them in and allows for jovial give-and-take that we both really enjoy. This side of me is laid back, casual, and a bit of a goof-off. The other side of my temperament demands control of the room - I must be listened to now; IsaidNOW! I hate the way I feel when I let this side take over and I know I'm wrong when I do it. Scouts is drudgery when this side prevails. So - now I plan well and then once I get there, care less, and enjoy them for what they are.


I'm still editing, but I think I want to stop for a while and throw my energies into something else; Yard projects sure, but I want to learn how to develop web pages; I want to learn how to make things pretty. I don't know if I have the interest and patience to learn how to write code that makes the website 'do stuff' though. I've dabbled in html and I get the concept. I love tizag.com btw. It's taught me a lot. My web design interest got derailed a while because morning sickness sapped my will for a bit, but I've come out of that. And then editing projects keep coming up that I keep saying yes to -It's habitual for me to always have some editing project I'm working on. They slip into my email and I do them. It's comfortable and comes easy but it's time to challenge myself with something I'm not good at now.

We had the flu last week and I got it the worst. I was in bed all Saturday and only got up to puke and lose other fluids. Conrad was home to take care of the kids. They scrounged on sugary foods and left a mess through out the house that would make rabid monkeys look tame.

Kids are happy and growing. Athena likes to pretend to be the mommy and she puts on my lip gloss many times a day. Yesterday I taught her that she can chew gum and wear lip gloss at the same time! When she pretends to be me I see myself through her eyes. The other day she dutifully scanned the stud finder across the pictures on the wall. Once that chore was done she climbed in my bed upstairs.

She informed me, "I have to take a little rest. If you come in here I'll give you a wittle spankin'"
"Okay" I said, trying not to laugh at the exact words that always come out of my own mouth when I'm trying to take a much needed nap.
She came downstairs ten minutes later.
"What are you going to do now?" I asked her
"I'm going to work on my cup-uter." She said, a serene but decisive look on her face.

Later - "Why did you put Carson in his room?"
"I'm putting Carson in his room because this toy is stupid." - hmm is that how my reasoning comes across to her? Yikes.

During lunch: "Mom! Look I have power!" - she said, her fingers all pointed in my direction.
"What kind of power?"
"Red Power. And Carson has orange power, and Daddy has green power," she said.
"What kind of power do I have?" I asked.
"You don't have power," she replied.
"Athena, what's power?" I asked.
"Power is a drink," she answered.

Later- "Mommy. I'm sorry I puke in your room. It was a lot of puke, and I'm sorry to do that puke... it was yellow." - I checked my room. No puke. Whew!


Carson is very clingy lately. He's got diarrhea and doesn't want to eat much. When he doesn't smell like sneeze he has his usual baby sweetness. I know he is a small toddler, yet I still cradle him like a baby and he loves it. I love to squeeze his little cheeks lightly and just hold them. He is a cuddler! He loves his bink and a soft thick blanket to cuddle with. I like to watch his face change as he watches tv or as he plays. He also likes to chase the vacuum cleaner. He can walk, but he is in no hurry to do it so he crawls for now. Carson is a big boob; he will cry about any owie and he likes to be babied. I like to baby him, but sometimes I say, "you're okay ham-bone." After dinner sometimes he smells like a 'ham-bone' or a 'beef-cake' because he likes to rub whatever he is eating all over his face and head.

We play monster and he runs from me. I muster up my deepest scary voice, "FEEee FIE FOE FUM! Here I come to spank your BUM!" or 'get your tum!' They scream and scatter. The kids love to jump and play on Athena's bed. It's the 'fun place.' Carson and Athena will be roommates in August because new baby will come two months after that. I've already re-arranged her room and Carson's toddler bed will be arriving next week! I'm excited to set it up but I will miss his being in a crib and the control that gives me over his sleeping schedule. This boy could be in a crib for sooo much longer. He is not a limit tester and he would not try to climb out, but new baby gets here Oct 10th. (Due date is 10-10-10) We find out May 14th what we're having! :)

Are these Good?

I'm not necessarily getting into photography, but I do enjoy taking nature shots like this and I like taking pictures of old things like weathered wood or rusting metal. I like catching the beauty of it. Some things just don't 'catch' in photos. My favorite is the first one with the dying leaves on the ground.

So I have a few shots I've taken and I'm asking the experienced and inexperienced alike to give me your opinions on what you think of these photos. None of them are lightened or altered in photo shop. I can see where the water could be more in focus- but I don't have a high end camera. I can see where the water photos need more of a focal point. And then I can see that the three trunk -the one with the two knots in it- could use some lightening up.

I want to go out and do some more.

Halloween Pics

Carson was a tiger, Athena was a Lion, Conrad was Indiana Jones, and I was an elf. (Those ears are not real) We did a trunk or treat, then Conrad and Athena went around the neighborhood while I passed out candy at home and put baby boy in bed. I set the candy bowl out for ten minutes while I put baby in bed. I heard three knocks while I was up there putting him down and when I came out the candy bowl was empty. I was angry about it and it stuck with me for a while. But I guess I'll never do that again. The night was just a lot of fun and I was in a trusting mood. I fantasized that the kid who took ALLL my Halloween candy had a reoccurring nightmare for a month that he was inhaling my enormous bowl of Halloween candy. Tsk tsk tsk. So vindictive. :) Bwahaha!!

Men Means... Lot's of Mans.

I was sitting/hunching over my computer- soggy posture when Athena walked and and noted my stomach. I watched her face change to one of sudden curiosity as she did a double take. She then asked, "Do you have a baby in your tummy? ...You can’t have a baby in your tummy right now. Carson is not in. He’s sleeping in his bed. You can make a baby another time."

Later she was playing with some sticky paper. She was talking to it and I caught, "And I say, 'get off my hand! Get off my hand! You stupid-naughty-paper!'"

I like hearing her thoughts stream from one idea to the next. Yesterday while we ate lunch she said, "You love me mom. I’m a baby to you. I’m not a cream cheese, or a bubble head, or uh eyeball. I love eyeballs and I can choke on them. (She’s talking about Halloween eyeball gum. And we were eating cream cheese. Not sure where the bubble-head came from though.)

Athena knows that Conrad is a man but she wasn’t familiar with the plural form ‘men’ when I used ‘men’ in a sentence.
She asked, “What’s ‘men’ mean?”
“Oh... man?” I asked her my eyes level with hers.
“No men!” She corrected.
“Men means… lots of mans.” I said simply.
She understood perfectly. “Ohhh,” she said with a smile.

It’s easy to tell when Athena is plotting general naughtiness; Just now she closed the office door so I wouldn't see her getting into things she shouldn't. Sometimes I let her believe for a while that I don’t know what she's up to- mostly I only do that when I'm too tired to stop her.

Sometimes she will say, “Mommy, go away. I want to be awone,” (so she can be naughty.)
"Do you want me to go away so you can push the bar-stool over to the pantry to get gum?"
"Yes" she says honestly. I love the sweet honesty for now. That'll change but I enjoy it for now.

A few days before Halloween she was in the office, pooping behind the door. That's where she poops- behind that door as she wears a pull up. She won't use the potty for that yet, so I let her use a pull up for now. Anyway it must have been roughly 7 minutes she was there as I busied myself in the kitchen. I realized it was too quiet and that she must be up to something. Sure enough, she had relocated to the office closet where the Halloween candy was stashed, and she had inhaled eleven or twelve peanut butter cups in that short space of time.

Just now she closed the office door while I typed in here. Then she pushed a bar stool across the kitchen floor. (I know from all the way upstairs when she is being naughty because I can hear the bar-stool scraping across the floor.) This time she climbed up to get a sucker off the counter. When she opened the office door again with a big fat sucker in her mouth I gave her a look that caused her to pause and wonder about her status. Was she in trouble? Was I okay with her sneakiness? She squirmed under my all-searching eye. You could see it in her sweet little face. She whispered humbly, “It’s okay. It’s own-ee a little bit naughty…. You’re own-ee a little bit mad.” I was enjoying the moment. I stared at her with a blank expression and she tried to convince harder, “Mommyyyy!! Your own-ee a little bit mad!” She was hoping to persuade me to be fine with it. I broke a smile and laughed. She got away with the sucker. Well, I can’t get after her for every little thing!

Snip Snip, Snip Snip

I’ve been cutting Conrad’s hair for six years now; and I really think it’s time I learn how to cut hair. While we were dating I half-watched his mom cut his hair: I made a mental note- Pull it up there, snip it off there. Got it. But there is obviously more to it. Every time I cut his hair I think, “oh crap - oh crap - oh crap.” Of course I never tell him this, and in the end it usually works out. Either way, he wears a hat everywhere he goes and he’s not picky about his hair. Tonight as I hacked away at the long top growth, he was anxious to get back to what he was doing. He kept asking me if I was done yet, like an antsy kid. But I was no where near hacking through that jungle.


It’s a well-known fact that Conrad’s hair is its own stand up comedian. His family always makes fun of it. When he wakes up you know he’s been switching sides all night long because his hair is standing up five inches. Straight up in one cohesive chunk. Like a stegosaurus. Every time I cut his hair I leave the top alone because I don’t really know how to cut it. This means the top gets longer every day until it takes on a life of its own and I have to shave it down for my lack of skill to know how to do anything else. So I shaved it down to an inch and a half. Ta-daa. He hasn’t showered yet because he’s playing WOW with his Bro-mance, Glenn.

Now we just need to shave the neck part.

kiddo update

Wow- it's been two months since I've updated. We visited Jeff and Brielle and it was really fun! Carson was an angel the whole time! He only fussed during the ear-popping parts of the plane ride. Brielle let him use Austin's crib which is the same exact set up he has at home- (just diff bedding fabric) so he was as good as sleeping at home. That made our trip great! Thanks Brielle; it was nice of Austin to share. We visited Purdue and some different little shops around West Lafayette; the locals pronounce it LAH-fee-eht. That's 'Sarah phonetics,' so I hope that made sense.

Athena's newest thing is playing with her tea set she got from Grandma Patty. She sits at the barstool and has me pour juice in those itty-bitty cups. I love having that sweet girl. She likes to dance in the living room. I'll have to get some video of that for you. She also directs music with her sweet little girl arms.

In her earlier potty training Athena was trying hard to make it to the toilet but had missed it and dirtied the floor instead. She would be so frustrated with herself and cry a lot. I knew she was trying and I wanted her to know that she didn't have to be perfect right away, but I didn't want to excuse the behavior entirely so pointing at the mess on the floor in front of the potty I said, "It's okay Athena. You tried. It is a little bit naughty, but you can try harder next time." Fast forward to a few days ago- I was toasting a bagel and before it popped up she sneaked some cream cheese out of the container, (which is not really a big deal.) I looked at her and from her perch on the barstool, her head tilted, a content smile crossed her face and her big blue eyes were half shut when she said, "It's okay. It's ownee a yiddle bit naughty." (only a little bit naughty) And I had to laugh.

I think it's so funny - she doesn't know about deception yet. Lately she wants gum and will climb up the pantry shelf to get some. After I stopped her from this she said, "Mommy, I want to be awone. (alone) You and Carson doe away and I tan be awone."
To which I replied. "Do you want to be alone so you can climb up the shelf and get some gum?"
"Yes." she said matter-of-factly.
I had to humor her and smile at her honesty. (Conrad and I both want to be careful not to punish her too much when she tells the truth or she will not want to tell us the truth later.)

Her potty training is going wonderfully, though today she had many accidents which she got in trouble for. 'Trouble' means mom is disappointed with her -which she hates- and then she has to sit in the laundry room- which is just a boring hallway to the garage. If it was a very naughty thing she did then she gets a 'knuckle' (a knock on her little noggin) and sometimes a little whop on her bum before she goes in for the time-out in the laundry room. There's a child lock on the door knob in there so she can't get out; same with her bedroom. She will be outraged that she is in 'trouble' status and she will scream and throw things at or hit the door. But as soon as she calms down I open the door and tell her what she did wrong and then she can apologize. We hug and then she's not in trouble anymore.

If I get short with her over trivial things because my patience is thin that day then she will be difficult to live with; bothering/bossing/controlling Carson or general irritating pesty-ness toward me. She acts this way when I have been unnecessarily grumpy or demanding -which I should not do, but I do it from time to time. To avoid this behavior I have to sincerely say, "I'm sorry. I was grumpy. I'm not mad at you and you're not in trouble. I'll be nice now." Then she feels understood and cared about. She is a sweet angel again after that.

She often says, "I want to have uh easter hunking egg" (I want to go on an easter egg hunt). We do little easter egg hunts every now and then. 3 to 6 eggs, with whatever sweet thing I have around the house. She's excited for Halloween and talks about trick-or-treating every day! She decided herself that she will be a scary blue monster.

We haven't spent much time outside lately. The hotter weather had kept me indoors, but the cooler weather is bringing us back out so we typically swing after dinner before coming in to jammie up in front of the tv before bed.

Carson can sit! He can eat finger foods too. He won't take a sip-pie or bottle though and this is bad because he needs more liquids in his diet than he's getting from me (nursing). He's got hard rabbit pellet turds; hey, this post wouldn't be complete if we didn't mention poop at least once! Anyway I'm having to give him liquids via medicine dropper. I guess I don't mind as long as he's getting more liquids; I love looking at his adorable little face. I love to kiss his baby mouth and squish his little cheeks. I love kissing his little neck and sniffing up his naked little tummy.

I give the kids baths together and it's even more fun now that Carson can sit up. They play well together. Athena has recently begun to roll him around the floor over and over. He likes her and he smiles about it good-natured-ly. He bobs his head to music. Yesterday Athena sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and Carson bobbed his head to it with an easy-going smile. He is genuinely a happy and easy baby. He will sit happily eating cheerios and raisins in his highchair for about an hour sometimes. Like all babies he has his tough days where he is more clingy, but those just end up being cuddle days which are sweet! For me, the hardest part about kids is losing sleep though. I develop some stressful anxiety if I know the kids are going to wake me up all night.

Let's see; I recently bought kid clothes at Kid to Kid. I do all my kid's shopping at Kid to Kid or Other Mothers. I love getting cute clothes for great deals. I also played soccer with Conrad's work team for the first time ever in life. The opposing team was very nice and they weren't super skilled so it was a good practice game. I loved it! But I really bunged my knee up good just from jumping around so I'll be more careful on it next week. It's mildly swollen.

I still love going to the gym but as far as weight loss goes, a person can lose weight on controlling food intake more than they can via exercise. But sometimes it's harder to say no to a bowl of ice cream than it is to just do a half hour of spinning to make up for said ice cream. For me junk food and exercise cancel each other out and I neither gain nor lose. But if I never eat junk to begin with then I can really lose something. I aim for 130 pounds by December 5th. And I'm at a rough 136 right now so that's totally do-able. I might shoot for 125 after that, but we'll see how I feel.

Lately I'm carrying around the motto's, "Leave it better than you found it," and "do it faster" (because I operate slower than your average Jane and I want to change that.) by "operate" I mean to say everything I do; showering, flossing, yawning. :) I take my sweet time, but this is a hindrance at times. The "leaving it better" motto applies to my house. If I leave each room better than I found it then I'm constantly cleaning up after myself/and kids bit by bit and not making a mess. It makes my life a little easier and less stressful. I hate when the whole place is a dump, I can't find my such-and-such, and I'm trying to hurry out the door.